How to get back up when you fall

When people give up or fail, it’s difficult to try it again. People who’s been following my posts should know from my previous posts that the reason why people fail or give up is because of lack of persistence.

Mind over Matter – Failure, Depression, Anxiety, Insomnia

Mind Over Matter – How to Persist/ Not Give Up

Mind Over Matter – How to Persist/ Not Give Up – 2

Why can’t you get back up?

because of the fear of failing again. People think its because they’re weak, and they fall into that disbelief in themselves. It stops them from trying again because they already framed themselves inside their weakness. This is where people start making excuses to justify not trying, they blame it on other things instead of their weaknesses, even though it might not be the matter of weak willpower. There are people who pushes through with pure willpower, and sometimes are successful. But that depends on what type of people they are and how big the goal is. For most people, its about breaking the disbelief in themselves to get up. But not only that, if they get back up and start lacking persistence, they’ll fall again.

So how do we overcome those?

First, you need to know where you are in the process and what you need to do. If you want to get to a certain place, you need to know where you are first, thats how you find which direction you need to go, and see whether if there is a shortcut or not and etc. Once you know your goal, you list down what you have to do in order to achieve it, then you breakdown the actions you need to do in order to accomplish each sub-goals. Your breaking down the goal into small pieces so that you can achieve it.

If your problem is 100, you break it down to 10, then you break it down to 1, then 0.1. How small do I break these down to? Until you think you can do it. Your changing that disbelief in yourself to a do-able belief. It simplifies the whole picture so that you can do it.

For example, if I want to open a blog, I need to take actions. If I just have a end goal of ‘open a blog’, I can’t do it because there is no process. I have to break the goal into small pieces of action such as think of a blog subject, make blog name, get a domain, choose if I’m going to install wordpress or use wordpress.com, pick design, put widgets, think of post contents, write 1 post a day, tag, look at stats, think how I can pull traffic, etc. In most of the things we do in our lives, there is a logical step in achieving something. If I just have a blunt ‘Open a blog’, I’m not going to be successful, its just an imaginary thing in my head. What stops people to start is that blunt end goal. Whatever you do, the first step is to break down the plan of action.

I saw a lot of people with dreams of becoming a millionaire, which is a huge goal that requires a lot of time and effort. It requires a lot of sub-goals and tasks. It’s funny how every one of them have same reactions when I ask “how are you going to be a millionaire?” they answer “I’m going to open a business”. “What sort of business?” and that’s when they start to go gibberish and fumble. Some people are able to explain the type of business they want, but when I ask “what’s the plan?”, that’s where they get stuck. If they can’t clearly explain what type of business it is or the plan, will it be likely for them to achieve it? anyone can imagine themselves becoming a millionaire or even superheroes. But if they don’t clarify the steps to get there in their mind, its just a dream. Big dreams, no plan. When you clarify the steps, it becomes a goal.

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